"Oh, how unfortunate!"

25^th May, 2012.

I was particularly edgy when I woke up, and plainly put, just downright annoyed that I had to get ready for my appointment. Sighing loudly to myself as I made my way down to the kitchen, I remembered that lunch will not magically appear no matter how many times I open the refrigerator door. I knew that I was supposed to take my medication on a full stomach and yet, like a defiant teenager, I popped two pills. Trudging my way back up to my room, I dialed the number to Comfort and City cab. The weather was warm. I was hungry and truthfully, feeling pretty sorry for myself.

“What the heck, I’ll just take a cab to the hospital. There’s no way I’m going to take the train in this weather.” I thought.

I was scheduled for a MRI scan that afternoon, and I was to go alone. My friends were busy and my mom didn’t offer. It was only a scan, yet I was scared. But I was feeling alone more than anything else.

Upon reaching the clinic, I was told to wait for an hour more as there were two more patients ahead of me. Fine, I’ll grab lunch then.

Took a slow walk out to the kopitiam at scrutinized the sad selection the stalls had to offer. Finally settled for the Nasi Padang stall, and ordered enough food to feed an elephant and I (not taking into consideration that elephants are, well, vegetarians). It seemed that the makcik at the stall kept getting my orders wrong no matter how I called out to her and pointed at the food from behind the glass.

“Cik! Ciiiiiiiiiiiik!” Oh my goodness, last warning ah this aunty. It was as though the glass was bulletproof or something. That was when a large, old Indian lady in her 60s sidled up to me and said, “You must call louder! She pekak (deaf) one!” Giggling, she repeated my order of sambal ayam to the makcik and grinned at me. I returned her a smile and a seemingly enthusiastic “Thank you!”

Just as I settled down at the nearest table, I was joined shortly by none other than my dear friend from the Nasi Padang stall. With a tray of food in one hand and three other bags in the other, she sat down awkwardly opposite me before setting down her items. I didn’t think I was in the mood, or up for any sort of conversation that day. After all, I was feeling sorry for myself. But something caught my eye, and I just had to ask.

“Cik, you’re only eating ikan (fish) and nasi (rice)? No sayur (vegetables)? Don’t like uh?”

“No lah, want to order sayur ah, expensive! Ikan enough lah,”

“Oh.” Comparing my plate of food to hers, it was akin to having a salad while she was only having a single pea. I exaggerate, but you get what I mean.

“Girl, don’t mind, can give me a bit of sayur?”

…I felt damn weird. No stranger has ever approached me to share my food with them before, except beggars. Even then, my friends would have chased them away.

Albeit feeling as such, I gave it anyway. No more than a scoop (equivalent to a pathetic count of only five leaves) later, she told me it was more than enough. I was skeptical. How will that ever be enough? She started eating with each miserable piece of vegetable cut sparingly into tinier pieces to go along with her spoonful of rice.

Just then, her phone rang. It was her son. Turns out, he lost his house keys and wanted her to open the door for him. “But I’m eating lah, later a bit can or not? Now? Ta pao (take away)? Cannot lah the food on the plate already! Okay okay, I eat faster then I come home already. Yes I will (be) faster,”

What an asshole.

She began shoveling food into her mouth even before she ended the call with that cute son of hers. It was easy to tell that she was struggling, as she couldn’t chew her food properly. I told her to slow down, lest getting choked.

“Haiyo, cannot lah my son need me to open the door for him. He always lost his keys then need me to open the door for him,”

I decided to chat her up, and she later told me that she had been hungry since twelve pm (it was already four), but she had to tahan (tolerate) because she will not have any dinner later. It was her only meal of the day.

My eyes started feeling hot. For the first time that day, I felt sorry for another individual other than myself.  Pointing to her plastic bag filled with medication, I asked if those were hers. She thought I was pointing to the other bag of goreng pisang (banana fritters) and said, “No lah, my mother like to eat goreng pisang, so I buy for her to makan lor,”

She would rather forgo dishes from her plate just to buy snacks for her mother. This was when I realized that she had finished her vegetables, and gave her more.

“Eh, malu (embarrassing) lah girl! Don’t need to give aunty so much! Just now that one cukup (enough) lah! You want to minum air (drink water)? Aunty buy for you,”

“It’s okay lah aunty, I cannot finish my food lah, too much! And I’m not thirsty, don’t worry,”

She was about done.

“Then now balik rumah (going home) ah aunty?”

“Ya laaaa, have to open the door for my son. Always like that, not the first time already. Always ask him to keep his things properly don’t want to listen.” I noticed her wincing a little as she was trying to get up from her seat.

At this point, I was still waiting for the right moment to say good bye. She seemed to be taking forever to stand up.

“Aunty, your leg sakit (pain)?”

“Ya, just finished operation on my left leg. So pain lah, a bit,” Her sad excuse of a son was still hurrying her to get home.

She turned and waved goodbye with a smile. My heart broke. I bid her goodbye and turned back to my plate, immensely disgusted with myself. None of the negative feelings I felt before were there anymore. Had I not gone for lunch, I would still believe that I was having a bad day.

Life, it shows us things we are too myopic to see. Teaches us lessons we are too reluctant to learn. Gives us individuals we don’t value enough to love. Count our blessings, cherish what we have and be contented. For what we have, others may yearn. Should we not learn to be contented, we will never be happy.