"We make messes of our lives, but every now and then, we manage to do something that's exactly right.

The challenge is figuring out which is which."--Jodi Picoult, Vanishing Acts

i realised that i was being selfish, even as a friend, when i remembered. when you spoke of joy, i saw him in those eyes. i realised that even though he was the one who made you cry, he was also the one who lifted you to the skies. i, on the other hand, would like to think of my words as a melody in your life. it's like bass, only that it had been so subtle you'll never realise it till it's missing.

i was wrong. maybe i have not loved you enough to know what you really needed. i had been too blinded by objectivity to realise that even if i could, i should never take your happiness away from you. it's like a package you see, you have your happiness AND your sorrow. neither can exist without the other. and it does make sense to wilingly accept your sorrow for whatever happiness as a locum. afterall, 'tis better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all.

forgive me, for i had it in your best interests for you to protect yourself. still, i will not take back my words because i meant every single shit i said; verbal and written. i have now realised that whatever decision you are to make, even if you know it's going to hurt, i can only be here for you.

i just hope that this man that you adore, will never speak of mere fluff again. because for a man worthy of you, he should not hide stuff for fear of hurting you--but because when you are bruised, he's the one who aches.